Reflections

As I was driving home this morning from taking Austin to school, I started thinking about my life.  The many things I had to do today and what needed to be done tomorrow and so on.  Then I stopped and thought about high school.  Dont know why but, high school popped in my head and I started remembering all these things I used to do in high school and where I was 10 years ago. 

So this is where I was 10 years ago and what I've gone through to get to where I am today.

10 Years ago I was a sophmore in High School.  I like to consider myself a pretty popular gal.  I was 15... almost 16.  Good grades, im sure they could have been better.  I was "THAT" girl next door kind of girl.  Didnt skip school, didnt drink, didnt do drugs... sorta the good girl.  But I was terribly in lust... not love... with a huge jerk who didnt really care what happened to me.  I did, however, have a good group of friends.  Maybe they did some bad things, but they were true to me and would always be there for me.  I dont really remember my expectations in life.  I had no clue what I wanted to be when "I grew up".  But with all that said, that very next year, I ended up pregnant in High School about to start my senior year, not knowing what I was going to do.  I thought that "dad" was the one I was going to be with forever.  Or at least I thought forever, back then forever was at least a few years which turned into feeling like an eternity. 

The pregnancy was not the worst thing in the world.  Now I look back and know God had to have been in this from the very beginning.  He made me stronger throught it all.  I pressed on, deciding to stay in school and keep going.  But that wasnt the case.  I ended up dropping out in November because it had gotten too hard to get up in the mornings, by then I was 7 months pregnant.  Barely fitting in the desk.  I can remember walking to the bathroom at school and having people stare at me.  Not what a senior in high school wanted.  So, I left school. At 17 I had my beautiful baby boy, Austin Bryce on January 31st.  He was tiny.  Only 6lbs 2oz.  I have to say I was pretty proud of myself not gaining a whole bunch of weight.  I delivered at 154lbs.  Oh but did it take me forever to loose that weight. (but that another post) 

Long long story short, 3 weeks shy of my 18th birthday, I ended up with a good job at an international shipping company, thanks to my aunt.  I stayed there for about 2 1/2 years.  Really liked what I did, but didnt like who I was working under.  During that time, I had almost gotten married to the.. once dad.. of Austin, moved in with my mom, moved out on my own into a one bedroom apartment, had been approached by my future husband, switched jobs, and completely moved on from my old life. 

At age 18 life was looking pretty good.  I moved out from the one bedroom and found a two bedroom that close to my mom.  She has always been there and will always HAVE to be there for me.  Shes like my left arm.  Ha.  I had great support from my family.  My sis and mom basically helped raise Austin with me.  Then my hubby stepped in the picture.  Oh he was so handsome and he adored me and Austin.  Still does today.  So things were going pretty well.  I turned 19.  Things still going well. 

Another bump in the road hit.  Pregnant again!  Oh no, What was I to do.  I had only been with Jon for 6 months.  Would he love me, would he stay.  The other guy left and didnt care about either of us.  I called Jon crying the day I found out I was pregnant.  He, of course, came running to my rescue.  He assured me he would always be there and never leave. 

We got married 2 months later.  It was a great wedding.  Horse and carriage took us away.  Granted I was 4 months pregnant by then, but I still looked pretty good in my dress.  Austin was only 2 1/2 when we got hitched, but he was the cutest ring bearer EVER!.  Jon and I worked great together.  Caden Andrew was born February 18th.  He wasnt so tiny.  Just average for a newborn.  7lbs 8 oz.  Super cute of course.  (I make cute babies) 

Just truckin' along.  I had gotten a new job, back in the international shipping business.  Things going well between everyone in the family and then Jon and I had to make a HUGE decision. 

Come back tomorrow for the ending of the story and where I am today in life.

Oh the suspense.